LGBTQ 30 Day Challenge: Day 23

8 07 2011

Day 23: An LGBT image that makes you cry or makes you angry?

I don’t really think this needs much explanation.  It just makes me so sad to see that the anger and hatred I had hoped would die with my grandparents’ generation is still alive and well in America.


LGBTQ 30 Day Challenge: Day 22

6 07 2011

Day 22: An LGBT image that makes you smile.


I can’t even begin to describe how much I want to be a dad. 

LGBTQ 30 Day Challenge: Day 21

5 07 2011

Day 21:Political LGBT issue that is closest to you and affects you the most?

I’d have to say marriage equality and adoption are both equally important to me and I think in many way, they go hand in hand.  Not that all LGBT people that want the right to marry also want to have kids, but I think there are many of them do. 

Marriage says to your neighborhood, your city, your county, your state, your country, your world, that you are committed to someone through thick and thin.  It doesn’t matter about gender, it’s about love. Just this past couple weeks while I was home with my mother, I made the comment that I wanted to get married and and have kids, and she was floored.  She asked me how I intended to do this and I said, “adoption, surrogacy, there are a lot of options.” Then she asked about the marriage and asked, “So, are you just not going to love her?” I was caught off guard this time.  It took a second for me to process and then I realized her thought process.  When I told her I intended to marry a man, she said, “that isn’t legal.” I’m so often surrounded by supportive friends and co-workers, especially in a university setting, that I forget so many people still feel this way.  That is way marriage rights are so important to LGBT people.  Just like not all straight people have to get married, neither do all LGBT’s, but we should have the right to.  We tried separate but equal in the 50’s and 60’s.  It didn’t work.  I don’t understand why that is so hard for people to understand or accept.  But I fully believe I will have the right to marry the man I love, gods willing we find each other, in any of the 50 states in this country before I die.  But if I don’t, as I told my mother, “I don’t give a fuck what the state says is legal.”  You can’t deny true love.

LGBTQ 30 Day Challenge: Day 20

30 06 2011

Day 20: Maureen or Joanne? (Or your favorite LGBTQ show or queer-positive show).

Why do I have to pick? I like them both! As for my favorite LGBT positive show, I’m not sure. I love True Blood and there is a strong LGBT presence on that show. And the cast is just sexy, come on. Other than that, I’m drawing a blank. So many shows have such strong, positive LGBT characters.

Queer as Folk is pretty good. Buffy: the Vampire Slayer had “Willow” and her girlfriend. That was probably one of the earliest regular characters I can think of that was LGBT. Bones had an LGBT character if I’m not mistaken. This is hard for me. I watch so much T.V. that I can’t really remember. Oh, HawthoRNe has a lesbian nurse. Haha, I guess I’m failing at this.

I will say that I think we are finally being represented pretty accurately on T.V. and in film. I think the fact that there isn’t a single stand-out choice is a good thing.

And I’m realizing that the original question said “show” and mentioned RENT. If we’re talking Broadway, is there actually a show that isn’t at least somewhat LGBT positive?

LGBTQ 30 Day Challenge: Day 19

29 06 2011

Day 19: Butch or Femme?

This is a loaded question and one I have issue with. Who defines what is butch? or femme? I don’t necessarily think these labels are bad things, as labels go, but I think we try to stick to them to rigidly.

Personally, I’d say I’m attracted to people on the more butch end of the scale. I like masculine men. That said, someone who is attracted to more feminine men aren’t any less of a man, they just have different preferences. And as far as my own personality and mannerisms, I’m pretty middle of the road, probably leaning to the butch side a bit. I like to fix and build things, can change a tire and the oil in a car, do some minor construction, but at the same time, I like fashion (looking at it, not so much knowing a lot), music, photography, design. For some, that makes me too femme, even if I don’t identify that way.

I think labels are useful in some ways. As human beings, we need to be able to categorize things to understand them. But we try to cling to these labels, that are often binary, and when things don’t fit neatly into one or the other, we aren’t quite sure what to do. I think that’s something we need to work on as a society. We need to learn that gender and sexuality are binary. And that’s there’s nothing wrong with that.

LGBTQ 30 Day Challenge: Day 18

28 06 2011

Day 18: Something about the LGBTQ community you don’t understand or have a question about?

Here’s the thing I don’t get: why the hell is the gay community so catty. I don’t get it. So many times, if you’re not a twink, you’re not gay enough. If you don’t shave your body, you’re not gay enough. If you don’t keep up with the latest fashions, you’re ot gay enough. On the flip side, if you do shave your body, you’re too gay. If you don’t have some muscle on you, you’re too gay.

For a community that is constantly striving for acceptance, tolerance, and equality, we turn on each other at the drop of a hat! It’s ridiculous. I was just reading an article today about a male model and half the comments could say nothing but how badly he had mutilated “such a beautiful body” with his tattoos. Really, people? Really? I just don’t understand. I like masculine men. I like men with body hair. I like men with tattoos and piercings. But I don’t expect everyone to agree with me. Why would anyone else expect everyone to hold their opinion? It just doesn’t make sense. And if you really think about it, if we all liked the same thing, the whole community would be fighting over a few “hot” guys, who would only want to date people that looked just liked them, leaving the rest of us cold and alone.

Grow up. Just as we tell straight people that we’re different, but still ok, we need to tell each other the same thing. Share the love people, share the love.

LGBTQ 30 Day Challenge: Day 17

27 06 2011

Day 17:Your first experience with an LGBT organization or event (Day of Silence, Pride, etc.)?

My first experience with n LGBT organization was at a Pride festival…and it was an accident. I go to the University of Tennessee in Knoxville, TN and my best friend and I, along with our lesbian partner in crime, decided to go downtown to Market Square and get some lunch. We don’t live far from there, but we drove, parked, and headed to one of our favorite spots, Tomato Head. As we approach, we start seeing tons of people. Tons of gay people. I was out at this point, but still not 100% comfortable with it. But as we got closer, I suddenly felt ok. Here were tons of men holding hands with men. And women with their arms draped around other women. And all in East Tennessee, not exactly what you’d think of as a hotbed for the homos.

But here we were, surrounded by happy, healthy, well-adjusted gay people. It was a really positive experience for me. There were other people there who had also stumbled unwittingly on Knoxville Pridefest. The one I remember most was a frat-looking boy and a girl. They were on a date for sure, but whether or not they were in a relationship, I couldn’t say. Either way, the girl was gushing about how cute it was that all the gay guys were there, holding hands and “being themselves.” Her beau kept nodding and trying to agree, but it was all over his face that he was uncomfortable. This said, many students at UT are from very small towns in Tennessee and have very little, if any, experience with openly gay people, especially in this magnitude. I can’t say I was 100% comfortable, so I can only imagine what he was feeling. He was polite and friendly enough and I can only hope he was caught off guard and was trying to soak it all in.

The whole experience was great and I went back, intentionally this time, the following year and thoroughly enjoyed myself. Unfortunately, I have to miss Knoxville Pride this year, and I already missed Nashville’s, but Memphis’ is in October and I’ll likely drive home for it. I’ve never been to that one and it should prove a very interesting experience.